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| Ethangomez's Characters | |
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ethangomez
Posts : 5 Join date : 2012-06-23 Birthday : 1997-03-25 Age : 27
| Subject: Ethangomez's Characters Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:33 am | |
| Name: Erone Roman Age/Birthday: 16 Gender: Male District: 8 Family: Father (deceased), mother, grandmother, and five younger siblings Brief History: Being the oldest male figure of his house, Erone feels that he has to protect everybody in his house. He is extremely social and is not afraid to meet a new person. He is the only child to remember his father and he was extremely close to his father. He supports the family as well. Physical Appearance: One dark brown and one bright green eye. Blonde/brown hair that are in dreads. Thin, but he has toned muscles. He is normal height for his age. Personality: Outgoing, friendly, strong-willed, and manipulative Flaw: deceitful Pets: German shepherd Rich or Poor?: Middle class Weapon of Choice: knives Talents: extremely fast, knife throwing, and excellent aim Preferred Angles: Funny, charming, social kid Angles this tribute will not do (Max. 3): mean, cut throat, and ruthless Other: will lie to accomplish anything
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| | | DinoLily
Posts : 556 Join date : 2012-01-16
Character sheet Hitpoints: (150/150) Character Name:: Alliance:: None
| Subject: Re: Ethangomez's Characters Sun Jun 24, 2012 12:42 pm | |
| There are just a few things I'd like you to change, but over all, great character! First off, could you list the names and maybe the ages of his younger siblings? Second, for personality, when we say "4 sentences" we don't mean 4 traits, we mean four actual sentences. So, you should change his personality to something like: Erone is very outgoing and friendly. Although, he can be strong-willed and manipulative. That there would be 2 sentences so it would need more work but, you get my point, right? Third, in his Physical Appearance, what you wrote isn't quite sentences except for "He is normal height for his age" Could you change the other sentences to something like: He has one dark brown and one bright green eye. He has dirty blonde hair... and so on and so on.
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| | | ethangomez
Posts : 5 Join date : 2012-06-23 Birthday : 1997-03-25 Age : 27
| Subject: Revision Sun Jun 24, 2012 1:45 pm | |
| Name: Erone Roman
Age/Birthday: 16
Gender: Male
District: 8 Family: Father (deceased), mother, grandmother, and five younger siblings. His siblings are May who is 6, Tam who is 9, Octavian who is 13, Octavia who is 13, and Movel who is 14.
Brief History: Being the oldest male figure of his house, Erone feels that he has to protect everybody in his house. He is extremely social and is not afraid to meet a new person. He is the only child to remember his father and he was extremely close to his father. He supports the family as well.
Physical Appearance: Erone has two different colored eyes, one of them is a dark brown while the other is a bright green. He has brown/blonde hair that are in dreads. His face looks ashy from the exhaust, while his skin color is olive. He has a slight build, making him strong enough to survive on his own. He is also normal height for his age.
Personality: Erone is extremely outgoing. He loves talking to new people and telling others stories. He is also charming and always acts sweet and kind around females. One of his favorite traits is that he can manipulate other people and turn others against each other. He is also extremely determined and no matter what obstacle is thrown in his way, he will find a way around it.
Flaw: He can sometimes be too loud.
Pets: German shepherd
Rich or Poor?: Middle class
Weapon of Choice: knives
Talents: extremely fast, theif, knife throwing, and excellent aim
Preferred Angles: Funny, charming, social kid
Angles this tribute will not do (Max. 3): mean, cut throat, and ruthless
Other: He will lie to accomplish anything
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| | | Light
Posts : 442 Join date : 2011-03-12 Birthday : 1997-08-08 Age : 27
Character sheet Hitpoints: (150/150) Character Name:: Drew Walker Alliance::
| Subject: Re: Ethangomez's Characters Sun Jun 24, 2012 1:49 pm | |
| You brief history seems more like a Personality, maybe you could describe how his father died, and what he has done since then?
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| | | DinoLily
Posts : 556 Join date : 2012-01-16
Character sheet Hitpoints: (150/150) Character Name:: Alliance:: None
| Subject: Re: Ethangomez's Characters Sun Jun 24, 2012 1:51 pm | |
| I have to agree with Light. Add a sentence to his history describing less about himself and more about his history and Erone is accepted! | |
| | | ethangomez
Posts : 5 Join date : 2012-06-23 Birthday : 1997-03-25 Age : 27
| Subject: Brief History of Erone Sun Jun 24, 2012 4:00 pm | |
| Erone's father died eight days after May was born, at the time Erone was only ten. His father, Jonathan, died of gangrene; after he had sliced his leg on a rusty pipe in the factory. His grandmother moved in a month later to help his mother, Etura, with supporting the house. At school Erone had been the fastest, not the strongest. He was considered a "higher class" in the school, for being athletically gifted. After school he goes to the factory, along with other friends and classmates, and works until the early the next day. He now feels that his chances for going into the Games are extremely high, for if either of his two brothers are picked, he feels that he would have to volunteer. | |
| | | Balisugar
Posts : 905 Join date : 2012-04-04 Birthday : 1998-09-29 Age : 26
Character sheet Hitpoints: (150/150) Character Name:: Alliance::
| Subject: Re: Ethangomez's Characters Sun Jun 24, 2012 5:05 pm | |
| Instead of reposting things you use the edit button in the top right hand corner of your post. | |
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