Chloe Botha's Chracters

Subject: Chloe Botha's Chracters Sun May 12, 2013 10:45 am

General
Name: Chloe Botha (First and Last)
Age/Birthday: Aged 12, December 10, 2000
Gender:Female
District: 12
Rich or Poor?: In Between I Guess
Weapon Of Choice: Bow And Arrows; But Can Throw And Knife Or Spear Not Too Bad
Personality/Appearance
Physical Appearance: She Has Blonde Hair And Blue Eyes.
She Is Not Too Tall. She Can Run Quite Fast, Because She Is Quite Small And Light. She Is Not Too Strong Or Too Weak. (Must be at least 4 sentences.)
Personality: Clever And Quick And Cunning, But I Do Tend To Be A Bit Rude Or Hostile Sometimes. I Am A Bit Of A Drama Queen And A Very Loud Talker. (Must be at least 4 sentences.)
Flaw: Tends To Be A Bit Bossy And get Claustrophobic (At least 1)
Talents:Good At Archery, Art, Hunting, Very Good Aim With Almost Anything. Also Very Quick And Smart And Very Quiet When Walking. Can Act And Fool People (Must list three)
Family/History
Family: Mother; Father; Older Brother; Younger Sister (Mother, father, siblings [if any.])
Pets: 1 Cat And 2 Goats. She Also Tends To Feed Wild Animals Such As Foxes Or Dogs.
Brief History: Grew Up To A Easy Life In The Beginning.
Things Got Worse When Her Father Lost His Job. Older Brother Now Does Small Jobs With Dad, But She Still Has To Do Quite A Bit To Keep The Family Going. Lives In A Small Area And Over The Years Has Developed A Routine To Keep Everything Together. (Must be at least 4 sentences.)
Others.
Preferred Angles : Mysterious And Fierce. Also Quite Hostile To Those Who Annoy Her. Tends To Rather Be Alone Or Work With A Partner.(Innocent, Sexy, Mysterious.. etc..)
Angles this tribute will not do: Sexy, Innocent Or Pitied. (Max. 3)
Token:Small Round Metal Pin With A Tree Stamped Onto It.
Other: Has A Strong Will To Survive And Keen Wilderness Instincts. She Sees A Way Out In Things That Seem Hopeless And Doesn't Give Up With Out A Fight

Subject: Re: Chloe Botha's Chracters Sun May 12, 2013 12:07 pm

Heyyo! First off, welcome to the forum! ^^ I'm Chii so nice to meet ya! Hope you have a great time here Very Happy

If you got any questions drop by the chatbox and ask any off the staff around Razz

Now, let's move on to your Charrie here xD we got just a few problems here before she's ready to go have fun in Panem. Very Happy

- Firstly, the time frame of Panem was not specific and thus the year is not mentioned, we usually write it out as "13 years old, 10 December" instead as Panem is not created with the time frame of 2013. xD

- Next, when the requirements are 4 sentences, it actually means 4 proper sentences. E.G: She has blond hair and blue eyes. That would be one sentence. What you have written is actually just 4 points, not sentences, thus we require you to change that up. This problem just goes for your Physical appearance, personality and History.

For example, "Quick, Clever and Cunning" is not a proper sentence. Instead, it can be switched up with "she was quick, clever and cunning as well." It's good to practice our command of English too so it's a win win situation~ Razz

- Then, we come to another part, about the talents and flaws. For "Talents", they are actually things that your character is exceptionally good at and will often be taken notice and applaude. Even though it is not inhuman to have that many talents but it is also not very believable. We try to avoid Mary Sues as they are not exactly great to roleplay with, soon you'll realise, xD sometimes, charries with flaws are more fun to play around cause that's what makes them human. For example, mentioning that she can cook and climb is unecessary. Because it is just something she can do, not something she is talented at. extra information can be written down by the "Others:" sections just so that we know that she can do those stuff as well! It's best to stick to 3 or at most 4 Talents because just like humans, we can be good at things but we can't be talented in a lot of things. :<

- Also, there's no need to write beside the headers as te headers in big text are just titles for the next bit of your character, it's best to put that bit of information under family for instance, where you talk about your family members and what they look like or have done for your charrie. extra information of them is completely optional though!

- While we're at the History part, we'll just touch on the talent part again this a little. "A young girl who can use weapons easily, climb trees and is smart than most." That's quite an extreme to be versatile in all three but if that's how your charrie is, this can still be exceptable, as it can very well be considered for three talents Razz

But onto the real History part, we're looking for the past of the charrie, things like what had happened to her, how was her life, how was her family and stuff. We can expand on the how she "grew up" part, and that will eventually make up 4 sentences Very Happy

whoo!

And that sums up about it! Very Happy

It's probably just that our character sheet maybe a little confusing for you so I got down to explaining quite a bit xD sorry if it was long! >< And last and maybe least, you are not required to have the same username as your charrie as one user on this forum is entitled to seven of them xD of course, it is totally fine! but I feel like it was worth mentioning a little! It may seem like quite a bit to edit :c but I promise it wouldn't take too long!

It'll be great to take a look at some of our forum people's charrie profile sheets as example on how they're written and stuff too! It'll definitely help paint a better picture and what I was yapping on about xD If there's any more you don't get feel free to ask me or any of the staff around! ^^ Have a great time here and join in the Panem fun! Cause we may have cookies! Very Happy

Subject: Re: Chloe Botha's Chracters Sun May 12, 2013 1:04 pm

Thanx For Helping Me Fix Things '-' I Have Changed A Few Of Them, Is What I Have Done Ok?

Guest

Hi, um, I'm Rainy, another staff member, and I'm sorry, but I would suggest you reread Chi's help post. You added MORE talents when she told you to take some off (there should not be more than five and you have like ten), you still don't have four full sentences for everything, and you don't need a birth year for the age. Also, a pretty major point- you really don't have to capitalize every word. For example: There Is No Need To Do This, when you can just do this. Please change ALL the things Chi told you to change, not just 'a few,' and someone will come along and see if they can accept your character. Razz

Sorry if I seem a bit rude, I'm trying to go straight to the point. Thanks!

» Chloe Botha's Characters (Remade)